I am in the process of two-fold waiting: waiting for Josh to come home, and waiting for the coming of our Lord Jesus. As much as waiting is always a struggle for an impatient person like myself, this is been a blessed and fruitful time. The juxtaposition of waiting for Josh to come home and waiting for Jesus has reminded me how marriage is an icon of God’s love for His people, for our ultimate union with him.
As you can see, it’s been a little cold here in North Dakota. Just this past weekend I found myself hibernating in my apartment and not wanting to get out and go to Sunday Mass (I LIVE ACROSS THE STREET FROM MY PARISH). I thought to myself, “If Josh was coming home today, I’d wait out in the cold for hours for him. I’d drive crazy distances to see him. Yet, here Jesus is, waiting for me and I am reluctant to go and meet Him? I am reluctant to brave the cold in order to be one with Him in the Eucharist?” This wasn’t self-deprecation or guilt, but the Lord working on my heart to remind me that He loves me and desires to be with me…that He wants to be the King of my heart, the lover of my soul. Our marriage is wonderful, but it is only a glimmer of the love He poured out on the Cross – the love that awaits us in Heaven. I love my husband with all my heart and I cannot wait for him to be home, to experience the sweetness of being together! That is how it should be. But this marriage, as glorious as it is, is but a sign of the Great Love of Jesus for His Bride. Our marriage is meant to lead us both into deeper communion with the Bridegroom. So it’s not about desiring Josh less, but loving them both more and more! It’s about making sure that we don’t make an idol out of marriage, but allow it to be an icon that reveals Jesus’ love for us and for the whole world.
Jesus, forgive our hardness of heart! We thank you, Lord, for your patience as we learn to love you as we ought. This Advent season, may we come to know the depths of your love for us, to know our identity as Your Bride. May we know, not only intellectually, but in our hearts that Your love is the only things that satisfies our hunger and our thirst for love. That marriage is a great gift and a source of joy, but Your love is the source of joy. Please bless all marriages, especially those whose marriages are suffering and need Your healing. We believe Lord, help our unbelief. We love You, Lord, but help us to love you more truly. We ask for the intercession of your most holy Mother, Mary. Amen.